Wednesday, September 14, 2005

threesomes

A friend was just telling me about a threesome she had a few nights ago. It happened when she was really wasted, as all threesomes seem to happen. It was her, one of our other good friends, and some random drunk guy they met at a party. They condensed and much less exciting version goes as follows: they went back to his apartment, drank straight vodka and started to hook up. When my two friends decided to go home, he followed. They eventually let him in, and my friend in question started hooking up with him. The two of them had sex, but my other friend was also in the bed, and she gave the guy head and was hooking up with him too. Lucky guy. She said afterwards she felt like a whore and didn't even want to think about it.
Anyways, the conversation got me thinking about threesomes an my experiences. Do people actually have threesomes when their sober? I don't think this is possible. My most recent "threesome" happened a few weeks ago. My best friend was in love with this guy Paul. Totally obsessed, couldn't stop talking about him all day and all night, and we only knew him for a couple of weeks. So we go out one night with him and his friends. I got pretty drunk and everyone else was kind of buzzed. So we're just hanging out, walking around, and then we go back to his apartment to play cards. Then I start hooking up with him. My friend gets pissed and says shes going to sleep. I'm drunk and horny and don't care at this point that shes really upset. So we're about to have sex/basically having sex on his couch when all of a sudden she walks into the room and yells "what the FUCK is this". I was drunk and couldn't do anything but laugh hysterically. Total cock-block but it was still funny at the time. I basically give up my hopes of having sex at that point because I figure she'll walk in at some point and start screaming again. So we all go to sleep. In the middle of the night, he wakes me up and we start hooking up again. Annoying friend wakes up and cock-block #2 occurs. Bastard. So I go back to sleep. I wake up, which was probably a few hours later and my friend is giving this guy head! But at the same time, hes feeling me up and shit. What the fuck. It's 7am at this point and I'm starting to sober up. I'm just too hung over for this shit. So I leave and fall asleep in the next room. 9 am solls around and my alarm for school goes off. They wake up and I can barely even look at them. All I want to do is find my purse and get the fuck out of there. Of course, this is new york city and I am having problems opening the 10 locks on his door. So he drives me to school on his motorcycle and I feel awful. After class, me and my friend both go home and go to sleep and try to block the night out of out heads. I don't think women ever really enjoy threesomes and in a threesome someone always winds up getting hurt or having sour feelings at the end of it.
The guy always seems to enjoy it though. My friend jizzy drives a cab here in the city. He told me a few weeks ago he told me he picked up 3 dancers at scores. They were flirting with him and the 4 of them winded up having sex one Tuesday night. He loved it, said it was the best fare ever. I guess I'm just wondering, do any straight women ever have positive threesome experiences? I've heard many threesome stories and never one where the girls really seem to enjoy themselves.

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